Of short shorts and caterpillars.

I had an interesting charter today. I had to do three trips from one of the high schools to the local tennis courts for three gym classes. Turned out it was all grade nine girls. The first two trips were uneventful – pick them up, drive, drop off, wait, load them up, drive, drop them off, repeat.

The third trip proved to be more entertaining. This class seemed to have – how shall I word this nicely – all the skanks of the grade. You know, the ones you can tell just by looking at them that they have the morals of a mink, and they dress accordingly. Now, this is gym class. Tennis, to be specific. Which involves lots of bouncing, jumping, running, reaching, you know how it goes. Which to my mind would require comfortable clothing that would allow for lots of movement.

Not shorts so short your butt cheeks are hanging out. And most certainly not shorts so tiny that the top barely covers your pubic hair, and the back treats the bus driver to an alarming view of your ass as you exit the bus! This was a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen. I kept a close eye on this chick from the vantage point of my bus. I was disappointed however, as the shorts stayed in place, no doubt due to her constant tugging and re-arranging of them.

The humorous part happened when one of the girls happened to spy a fuzzy caterpillar making its laborious way across the court. Being afraid someone would step on it, or bounce a tennis ball off it, the girl called out, “Hey, there’s a really cute fuzzy caterpillar here!” In response, every single girl in the class stopped in mid swing and raced over to see the fuzzy caterpillar. Even Wardrobe Malfunction Girl was bent over, examining the caterpillar.
Naturally, tennis could not possibly continue as long as Fuzzy Caterpillar was endangered by the game, so the girls started trying to figure out who would pick it up and move it off to a safer locale. Naturally, being teenaged girls, not one of them would touch it. I was almost to the point of getting off the bus and rescuing the poor thing myself, when the teacher realized her class wouldn’t get anything done unless the caterpillar was moved. So she moved it.
And the girls slowly dispersed, wandering back to their games.

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