Love Month Epiphany…

I mentioned a while back about an epiphany I’d had. Guess I should get around to describing it.

Back story…I’ve always been a person people felt they could trust. Not sure why, but I often found myself on the receiving end of sad stories. When something went wrong, for some reason people felt they could come to me. I couldn’t always help, but I was always sympathetic.
I noticed a few years back that this had stopped. No one seemed to be coming to me for help. I wondered why – briefly – considering that maybe I was lacking or failing in something, but then I pushed the concern away, reminding myself that I had way too much on my own plate to deal with other peoples’ issues anyway.
Then all hell really broke loose in my life and I found myself being the one in desperate need of help from various sources. For once, I asked for the help I needed, and the Universe brought it to me. My friends stepped up and were incredibly supportive and encouraging in so many ways. It made the journey to now bearable and, I think, hastened my own healing.

Over the past few weeks some interesting things have happened. A friend is going through a separation and we have been talking about what she can expect and how to deal with it. Another friend was faced with the imminent death of her father, and I was able to help her by sharing some of my own experiences when my dad died. Yet another friend is going through some difficult times with her daughter, and she made the comment to me last week, “I don’t know how I’d have gotten through this without you, Sue! How did I survive before I met you?!”

That was the comment that slapped me upside the head with the realization of what was happening. The Universe has decided that I am sufficiently healed of all the crap I was dealing with myself. It recognized that I was incapable of helping anyone while I was as messed up as I was for a few years there, so no one was coming to me. That the Universe is sending people in need of help my way tells me I am healed. I am better. I am strong again. Yes, there will still be moments of doubt, fear, anger and pain, but they will not be as frequent and I will be better able to deal with them. And now I can help others again. As I am meant to. All is as it should be. Blessed be.

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